Relationship Coaching
The fight is never really about the fight.
Underneath it is a pattern, and patterns can change, even the parts that are yours. Relationship coaching for couples and individuals, from a licensed clinician. Online, anywhere in the country.
Why do you feel stuck?
It is not a communication problem, not really. It is a pattern problem: the same reaction, the same story, the same spot where everything goes sideways. One of you says something ordinary, the other hears an attack, and you are off.
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Most of these patterns are not ones you chose. We copy what we grew up around, and a lot of it simply doesn't work. Getting free means being willing to look strange to the people who know you, even your own family. The ones who make it get weird, and quit worrying about how normal they look.
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My job is to help you see the pattern instead of living inside it, and give you the tools to start breaking out.
How this works
01
We Find the Pattern
Before we fix anything, we get clear on what is actually happening between you: where it breaks down, what each of you is really reacting to, and the older story it is really about.
02
You Learn the Tools
In real time you learn real moves you can use when it is heated. How to say the hard thing without it turning into a fight. How to catch yourself before you react. How to tell a feeling from a fact.
03
You Practice it for Real
We work the actual situations in front of you, not theory, until the pattern genuinely starts to shift and you can repair on your own when it tears.
THE FOCUS
FOR COUPLES
The fight that keeps resurfacing, feeling unheard or shut out, rebuilding trust after it has taken a hit, learning to be honest without it blowing up, and repairing when you hurt each other instead of letting it pile up.
FOR INDIVIDUALS
The patterns you keep bringing into your relationships, dating that keeps going the same way, a specific relationship that is wearing you down, boundaries, over-functioning, and learning to show up as the partner you actually want to be.
WHO IS THIS FOR?
This is for couples who love each other and are tired of running the same loop, and for individuals who want to understand why their relationships keep going the way they do. Either way, it works best if you are willing to look at your own part, not just the other person's.
COACHING NOT THERAPY
This is coaching, not therapy. We work on patterns and skills and where you want to go, not diagnosis or treatment. It fits if you are basically well and want to change how a relationship works. If something comes up that really belongs in therapy, I will say so, and help you find the right person for it. The clinical training is what I bring to the coaching. It is also how I know where that line is.
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If you are a Colorado resident and therapy is the better fit, that is available separately.
HOW WE WORK TOGETHER
Everything is online, anywhere in the country. To start, email me a few lines about what you are working on, and we will figure out which option fits.
INDIVIDUAL COACHING​
$275 / session
50 minutes · or six sessions for $1,500 (save $150)
One-on-one coaching on the patterns you bring into your relationships and how you want to show up.
COUPLES COACHING​
​$300 / session
80 minutes · or six sessions for $1,650 (save $150)
The two of you and me, working the real pattern out loud, with me keeping it honest and safe so nobody gets piled on and nobody gets to hide.
Please note:
Coaching fees are paid in advance and are non-refundable, including any unused sessions in a package.
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Coaching is not therapy or crisis care. If you are in crisis, thinking about harming yourself or someone else, or otherwise not safe, coaching is not the right resource for that moment. Please reach out to a licensed provider or emergency services where you live. In the US, you can call or text 988 (the Suicide and Crisis Lifeline) or call 911. I am always glad to help you find the right kind of support.